MUSIC MONDAY

As a way to share my own music, as well as other music that inspired me, I decided to start "Music Monday."  I can't promise that I will do this every Monday, but since music is a part of my process, I thought I would pass on what's been going on in my world to yours!

As a follow up to my last post, I kept thinking of the most recent song I wrote.  I do not have a recording of it yet (hopefully this fall/winter!), but here are the lyrics.  I hope it makes you feel good-enjoy!

Good Condition
Pick a foot
Put one in front 'another
Take a step
Take a leap and you'll go further
Don't overthink
Don't overthink it, just do
What you know,
what you know is best for you

Get rid of the things that drag you down
No need for baggage when you wander around
Let it go, let it be
Surround yourself with positivity

The way you choose to live your life
Plays an essential part
In how your days will end &
How your days will start
Weed out the leeches
Suckin' you soul
They take from you 'cuz they
Just don't know how to...

Get rid of the things that drag them down
No need for baggage when you wander around
Let it go, let it be
Surround yourself with positivity

Define success by doing your best
Don't compare, don't you dare
That's two steps back and not ahead
Foster good thoughts instead

Your own worst critic
You may be
But you are not
Your enemy
Treat yourself
As good as you'd treat others
Cleanse yourself of
All that useless clutter

Educated is not always complicated
You must simplify and retrain the roadways of your brain
Time for transformation and to switch to good condition
It's the ultimate position to be put in
Let yourself, let yourself feel good
Let yourself, let yourself feel.

Embracing the Chaos

In our world today, it is easy for our senses and minds to be smothered by the constant noise of the media, music, facebook, etc.  Then there are the pressures of making a living, paying bills, putting food on the table, cleaning the house, doing laundry, and attempting to get enough sleep to function the next day.  Even things like goals, involvement in activities, spending enough time with loved ones, and other things can become a bit much to handle.  Where is the balance?  What should I be doing right now?   So much to do, so little time!  The to-do list keeps growing, yet there are only so many hours in a day.

I have reached a strange point in my life.  I don’t dread turning 30 like a lot of people.  But, for some reason when I turned 28 a few months ago, I started freaking out a little bit.  I thought, “I only have two years to do something with my life!”  Why I put that kind of pressure on myself, I am still not sure.  I am an artist, nothing is cut and dry, there are no rules!  But, my birthday, along with my grandpa passing away the end of May, made me take a good look at my life and what I want for it.

"Would you just look at it? I mean, just look at it!"

 

 

I am grateful for all the people and things in my life, but I still couldn’t help but feel overwhelmed.  Sometimes I worried that all the things that I am involved in were just ‘busy work’ distracting me from what I should actually be doing.  Why am I stressed if my life is filled with so many things that I love?

As the summer has progressed, I have taken breaks from things that I enjoy, I have gotten out of town almost every chance that has presented itself to me, and I have tried to escape the madness.  As I have been integrating these things back into my life, I have realized that I don’t want to be without them.  I want to focus on my sewing business and really making that my main source of work, but I also need to keep involved in my other activities because they fill a part of me that my sewing business cannot.

This summer has been a time of reflection and realization for me.  I am accepting the bad things about myself, along with the good, and making the most of it.  I am often late for things, sometimes I let my emotions get in the way, and I am kind of a hoarder of anything I think I can use in a future project (just to name a few!).  But, I am passionate about creating, I love my family and friends, and I strive to circulate nothing but good back into the world (just to name a few!). Once we are honest and accept the truth, it is then that we can move forward.

I am also simplifying and weeding out the unnecessary things.  I have been doing a lot of cleaning and taking many trips to the thrift store to get rid of things.  I am working on getting more organized.  I am trying to spend more time with people that make me feel good and less time with people who don’t.  I am enjoying the silence on the rare occasions that happens.  I am slowly ridding my life of the clutter and get down to the bones of what will make me happy. 

So, my life is crazy…but at least it is filled with things that I love.  It is that madness that makes me who I am, and I feed off of that.  There are things I will not be able to change, but at least I can make changes within myself.  Instead of escaping, I am now embracing the chaos!   

Speaking of stitches...Broken Crafter Makes Recovery

Knotty B. Knockout

I don't know if you know this about me, but I am a derby girl!  I started when a league was formed in October 2010.  I had the Fisher-Price skates as a child, then upgraded to rollerblades in the 90s just like everyone else.  So, when I heard talk of a derby team starting, I was quite curious.  I'm not a naturally aggressive, violent, or competitive person, but I thought I could at least skate!  I got all my gear, started going to practices, and pushed myself to work hard.  I will admit, it is a little scary at first!  It is a full contact sport, you get knocked down, bruised, and sore.  Back at the first informational meeting, they told us,"You WILL get hurt.  Hopefully it won't be anything serious, but you will get hurt."  But, after my first bout, and I realized that I made it out alive, I was addicted!   Our team consists of the most diverse, hard-working, passionate women that I have ever met.  Also, I have noticed very positive changes in myself since I joined derby, not only physically but in all areas of life.  It's a tough sport, but it's worth it!  (Sidenote: My derby name is "Knotty B. Knockout" which came from being a knotty knitter! ;) )

So, after 6 hours of practice a week (plus my first gym membership to get in better shape on my own), roadtrips to bouts, mixers, and clinics, making new friends that are now family, studying rules, and researching better gear and techniques, roller derby has become a big part of my life.  I've become pretty comfortable on my skates.  In fact, when I'd strap them on, I'd feel like an invisible superhero!  Maybe it's that feeling that got me in trouble.  On Nov. 27th, 2011, I was attempting a legwhip towards the end of practice.  (To see how a legwhip is done correctly, watch D-Bomb do it!  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VVWaOpa1_ic) 
Instead of success, I rolled my ankle (and I think I landed on it when I fell).  Normally, I am not afraid of falling, we do it all the time!  That's why we wear so much padding!  But, this time was different.  I immediately took off my skate, knowing something wasn't right.  I couldn't put any weight on it, so I was wheeled to my teammate's vehicle and rushed to the ER.  Though the doctor was hopeful, maybe because I wasn't freaking out and was trying to keep a sense of humor, the x-rays came back...my left ankle was broken in 2 places!  They wrapped up my leg, gave me my first pair of crutches, and sent me on my new journey.  Let the struggles begin!

I had an appointment with a Bone & Joint doctor the next day, then having surgery the day after.  My doctor was concerned with the shifting of the bones, so he decided it would be best to put in the stainless steel plate, pin, and 5 screws to hold everything together.  This will stay in there, unless it gives me problems in the future.  Though it weirds me out to have all this foreign material in my ankle, I'd rather not need surgery again!

I won't lie, the first couple weeks were kind of rough.  I spent my time lying on the couch with my leg elevated.  When I had to get up, I would get shooting pains through my leg and foot that may have hurt more than the break itself.  But, I kept my attitude up.  I was grateful for all the help from my boyfriend and family, all the cuddle time with my cat, and the random visits from friends.  Also, looking on the bright side, it was nice getting to sleep in and have a lot of freetime! 

As the pain faded, I was able to move around more.  After a few weeks, I got my soft cast off and got upgraded to a walking boot (still accompanied by crutches).  I like to think I am an independent woman, so it was difficult for me to ask for help all the time.  I did what I could to figure out different ways to do things myself (ex. Since my craft room is upstairs in our house, I rigged up a pulley system to send things up and down the stairs to and from my craft room.  Then, I'd scoot up or down the stairs on my butt to retrieve the items.).
Soon came the holidays-spending a lot of time with family and friends.  We made the best of the situation, and it seem like my recovery time flew by!
 The baby steps continued.  There were a lot of little things, small feats, every day that I cannot even begin to tell you about them all.  So, I will continue with the big stuff!  Soon, I was gradually applying weight on my foot, got to ditch the crutches.  Before I knew it, I got my walking boot off and all I had to wear was an ankle brace!  I eased my way back into work, and now things are almost back to normal.  I've been doing physical therapy for the past 3 or 4 weeks, getting flexibility and strength back.  And soon, (this weekend!!!!) I will be skating again!

Some people may think I'm crazy for going back to skating after this whole ordeal.  But, as a friend said, it's never crazy to go back to something you love to do.  Though I didn't get as much crafting done throughout this almost 3 month process, I feel that I learned a lot...
Never take doing normal things for granted.  Be grateful.  Attitude is everything.  Let people help you when you need it.  Say thank you.  Tell your loved ones that you love them. 
I know, cliche central, right?  But there is truth within them.  As I get back into my life as it was before, I am going to do my best to enjoy every single day, look for the positive in every situation, and continue to fill my life with things I love.

Again, HUGE thank you to my sister for being there for me through it all, my boyfriend for waiting on my hand-and-foot while I was broken & having such patience with me, my parents for the endless support, and friends for the good times.  *much love*           

  

Edible Fashion: Part 2